My sweet life today

I hope that I'll be able to fully capture my feelings and thoughts in this here post....my life completely changed from where I thought it was going in a matter of ten minutes yesterday. Since those ten minutes, I've felt feelings I've never felt in such depth and I've learned things I didn't even know I needed to learn or understand. I'm humbled by the goodness of the my Father, to whom I owe everything.
On Monday, my boss pulled each of us rec. therapists in one at a time to tell us that they'd have to be eliminating one of the positions and he was wondering if there was anyone who was planning on moving on with life soon. Come to find out, no one was. So yesterday, after having being there for about two hours, he asked me to take a walk with him down to the admin building. This I willingly did knowing it was almost certainly my last along that road as an employee.
We made small talk about...random stuff :) really I was thinking about the past six months and how good they had been. I'd learned so much from those kids, felt so much love for them, learned so much from my co-workers...colleagues...whatever the professional name is for the people you work with. There have been many times, walking back to the office from a group along that same pathway, that I just couldn't help but smile and laugh to myself at how much I loved what I did and who I got to do it with. There were other times that I would walk back to the office so frustrated and confused at what else I could do. And now I was walking the road for the last time.
The HR woman explained everything to me, they wish they didn't have to let me go, but they had to. No money meant no choice. I was pretty proud of myself for holding everything I was feeling in there while at her office. I don't remember most of what she said, I was focused more on what I was feeling.
I wasn't even quite sure if I could pinpoint the feeling. Was I angry? No, not angry. Hurt? A little, no, a lot. Not by them letting me go, but because I had to go, that hurt. Sad? Very. Confused? Yes, about what I would do next. I wanted to stay. I almost wanted to tell them, I didn't care if they wouldn't pay, I wanted to stay.
She took my badge, and I walked alone back to the office (my boss had left after the HR lady was done explaining that I would be laid off). I went up the stairs, and there were the people that I like so much and have been incredible examples to me. Because of them, I am who I am right now. I won't go into detail, but yep, they've helped me so much as I've learned by observing them and talking with them.
I'll fast-forward (sorta) through the rest of yesterday. I cried a lot some. Spent time with friends. And spent a lot of time thinking. I felt so beautifully the Lord's love and assurance, I still do. People ask how I'm doing...it's kind of a hard question for me to answer. I'm doing okay, I feel hope, peace, love, and I'm gaining understanding. So with that in mind, I'm wonderful! It hurts, but I'm wonderful.
I had the opportunity this morning to attend the temple with a wonderful friend. I was taught a principle there that has helped me to gain confidence in all that is taking place and hope for the future. It is something taught in the book of Abraham and I'll call it the "be prepared" principle.
It is actually taught throughout the scriptures in about...well I didn't count...but a lot of places. I'll start in Abraham though.
Abraham uses phrases like "prepare the earth", "order the (fill in the blank)", "organized the lights", and "Let us prepare the waters". In Alma 18:39 it talks about the plan that the Lord has "prepared from the foundation of the world". Alma 13 uses that phrase multiple times to describe the Lord's planning. The earth had to be prepared step by step in order to be ready for the children of God to inhabit it. Prepared and organized in every detail and way.
The pre-earth life was preparation for this earth life, and this earth life is preparation for eternity (Alma 34:33). The Law of Moses was preparation for the coming of Christ (Mosiah 13:30-31; 2 Nephi 11:4). The baptismal covenant is a preparatory covenant to the covenants made in the temple (Elder Bednar, April 2009).
The Lord tells us that "[He] prepared all things..." (D&C 104:17). If it is a preparation process, that must mean that there is something coming next.
In Ether it talks about the Jaredites and their journey across the sea. The Lord gives them specific instructions and then says "And behold, I prepare you against these things; for ye cannot cross this great deep save I prepare you against the waves of the sea, and the winds which have gone forth, and the floods which shall come" (Ether 2:25). I would have to say that the Lord has truly prepared me throughout my life to experience what I have to this point. Surely this is preparing me further.
I'm not quite sure what tomorrow will bring. I'm excited to find out. All the same, I know the promise the Lord makes in 1 Nephi 17:13, the "[He] will prepare the way before [me], if it so be that [I] shall keep [His] commandments...and [I] shall know that it is by [Him] that [I] am led." I know preparations have been made and I'll see the way laid out as I choose to be an "agent" (D&C 104:17).